Friday 24 July 2009

Rebel with a baby - I mean cause.

I have come to the conclusion, that I’m a rebel mummy. Yep, I am.

When I got pregnant, I read a stupid amount – books, websites, articles, leaflets from the midwife – everything I could lay my hands on.
I was going to be the best read, best prepared, most perfect mummy EVER.

HA!

Having had a real life baby for a little more than three months (rather than the little text book version who feeds 3 hourly on the dot, naps with military precision and never ever cries for more than a few minutes {really, Gina Ford, really?!}), I know now, that pregnancy books should be viewed as a rough guide. A jumping off point to start negotiations if you will.

Here are just a few of the mummy rules I’ve already broken…

Do not mix breast & bottle in the first months. Check.

If breastfeeding, do not offer baby a dummy in the first months. Ooops. (I was not prepared for the 40 minute cry-a-thon on day 4, having slept for about 6 hours since the little dude’s birth – so the dummy that came free with our steriliser was an absolute godsend. I am glad though that the noodle only uses it for maybe 5 minutes while he’s settling down to sleep.)

Use Controlled Crying – nope. Tried it once, felt like the worst mummy ever, not doing it again.

Make a bath part of baby’s bedtime routine every night. Much as the little dude quite enjoys a splash in the bath, it’s still a bit of a large scale operation – and frankly far too time consuming for every night. Plus, he’s a baby, apart from the nappy region, he doesn’t get all that dirty. So he generally has a bath 2 or 3 times a week, and gets topped & tailed daily instead.

Mummy should sleep when the baby sleeps. Nice theory, but when am I supposed to take a shower, do laundry… eat?

Don’t let your baby fall asleep in your arms – always put them down awake. This is the one I hate the most. I love cuddling my baby boy, and when he gets sleepy, I love the way he snuggles right into me (especially now he’s learning to cuddle properly – chubby little arms grabbing you tight :D). We settle down on the couch together, I sing him a song, and he soothes himself off to sleep. It’s not all the time, but yes, it’s at least once a day, and yes, I enjoy it. So there. Sorry Ms Ford, we’re just going to have to agree to disagree.
(and he's still quite happy to settle himself down too, so I'm not making a rod for my own back!)

So does breaking the rules break your baby?
Of course it doesn’t.

My little man is amazing (yes, I know I’m biased, but it’s true!), he hardly ever cries unless he’s hungry or in need of a new nappy, he’s almost sleeping through, learning new things crazy-fast every day, and is definitely not suffering as a result of his mummy making up her own rules!

All the books and what not are all well and good, but they really shouldn’t take over from the most important ruling of all – mummy instincts.

However, for a little light relief, these baby do’s & dont’s are well worth a look – I’m emailing the link to all my pregnant friends :D

4 comments:

  1. I read the books too and came to the conclusion most of those 'rules' are crap! Especially the 'controlled crying' one (honestly if i was upset and DH left the room until I'd finished crying I 'd never forgive him!!). I've got some good ideas from books but mummmy instinct and just treating the little human being with respect are much more important.

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  2. zooarchaeologist25 July 2009 at 14:12

    With babies its all about phases, what works one week doesnt the next. By the time you are getting no sleep at 12 months, controlled crying might seem like a good option!
    Keep your mind open about the stuff you read and invent new techniques yourself. You never know you might make your own fortune. x

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  3. Great post!
    The best thing you can do is follow your maternal instinct and work with your baby. Gina Ford can naff off.

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  4. miss leslieanne29 July 2009 at 22:31

    It's nice to know I'm not the only one making it up as I go along :)

    and zooarchaeologist - *love* the idea of making my own fortune from baby tips... best start writing things down :D

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